floorboards, pt. 1 (retrospect regret)
Between the grooves in the floorboards
Lies a hallowed treasure
Stories, memories, dreams that could transform a world
I never used to be caught up in these rushing tides
Dragging me further and further from the shoreline
But it did. Sometimes you can only wet your feet once
Chance the tides, dance upon them and before you know it
you’ve lost ten months.
Then they devastate your dreams.
They decimate your pride.
But they never, ever let you hide.
And yeah, maybe I was a little different
A little too soft, a little too sensitive
Maybe I was easily provoked
and never managed my anger well
But that’s okay. Now.
Because you were wrong.
To put me down and drag my face across the Earth
Force your beliefs through my head, brainwash me till I was deaf
Deaf to all the face surrounding me, blind to everything that was happening
Turned a cheek to all your wrongs, forced to bow down to your God
While you stood there raking the cash, raking the soil
Education isn’t cheap, without a little bit of toil
But what did you teach, or what was it that you preached?
The words of hate and discrimination? From fiction, facts were imitated
That’s all you did
Sing songs praising your Lord.
Hell, I never wanted to be in your institution
But you pretended as if I needed to be included
Like I was a misguided little brat
Sinking ever faster into the sand
But I was never that, never the one to give a damn
But all that changed when you gained the upper hand
I gave up all use of my brain
Cut down to the bare grains
Shackled to an early grave
Believing I was never tamed.
But now, now is too late
To change my perspectives,
To change all of my ways
No longer an individual
I’m on the side, just residual.